Tomorrow, Adrian and I are off to my hometown of Santa Maria for the long weekend and with the excitement of seeing my family, there also comes another feeling - what Katie has referred to as my "Santa Maria complex." This complex basically consists of the fear of being out somewhere and seeing someone I went to high school with - it is an irrational fear, but one that I have yet to get over. When I am in Santa Maria, I do everything I can not to go out in public. You would think that I was 200 pounds and embarrassed of my acne-prone skin or something. In fact, I look way better than I did in high school, I'm way more self-confident, and I get to walk around with the man I love. Yet, the "complex" persists - I would love to have some psychologist tell me where it comes from and what it all means. The funny thing is that in the 11 years since I graduated and all the many, many times I've been back to my hometown, I have probably had less than 5 experiences of a run-in with someone from the past. So it's not like they happen all the time - well, this could be because of the infrequent times I go out - but I digress. Anyways, my suitcase is packed with my best clothes just in case this trip happens to include a run-in. Wish me luck.

There are a ton of trashy chick-lit novels that I refuse to spend money on, so when I see them at the library, you'd think that I would be ecstatic and snatch them up as quickly as possible. But I've recently found out that this isn't the case. I'm actually quite embarrassed to pick them up - as if I don't want the other library patrons to think I would be the type of person to actually read those kinds of books! What I found I do is I circle the shelf the book is on debating in my mind whether I really need to read it, then at the very last minute I grab the book and stuff it in the middle of the pile of books I'm carrying. As I walk home, I imagine scenarios where the bag of books I hold breaks in the middle of the street and people stop to help me until they see THAT BOOK and then they walk away in disgust. I guess I need to bring a backpack next time - they don't usually break.

Used clothing stores that buy used clothing have a real racket going. I just went to sell two huge bags full of pants and skirts that don't fit me anymore with the hope that I could leave with at least $50 in my pocket. The girl examines all my stuff piece by piece - those she takes get a new little tag and an entry into the calculator - those she doesn't get handed right back to me. When she's done, I notice that the grand total on the calculator is $116 and I rejoice secretly inside. However, I forget that she will then cut that figure in half leaving me with $58 - more than I came in wanting which is good - BUT the $58 figure is good only if you want that as "trade" or in-store credit. Phooey on that - give me the cash! I walked out of there with one full bag of clothes not taken and $40.60 in my pocket. Not great, but not bad.

I don't know if any of you know much about garbage trucks, but I'm a little concerned that my efforts of recycling are being ignored by them. We have four garbage bins and two specific recycling bins in the back of our apartment building. I make a concentrated effort to sort out all recyclables and place them in the appropriate bin. Being that I'm home during the day, I have learned that all the bins get picked up on Tuesdays - BY THE SAME TRUCK. I've never taken much notice of the truck before, but am I supposed to believe that they have a special section on the truck for the to-be-recycled materials. I really doubt it and that makes me sad. However, I am jumping to conclusions and Adrian keeps telling me that the trucks are huge - I guess next Tuesday I will make a point to watch out my window like a crazy old lady to see what really happens. I'll let you know.